This World We Live In

While Miranda thinks that she should be feeling better—her father is back, her little brother is healthy, and she has met an interesting teenage boy—she still feels unsettled. Jon seems to have fallen for Julie. The food situation continues to be of concern, and everyone cuts their rations back, except for Lisa, who is still nursing. Miranda notices that Charlie eats the least of anyone, and he explains that he was once quite overweight. He feels healthier for having been forced to eat less.

Dad tells the kids that he will not leave them again, which is a relief to Miranda. They make a plan to get more food from City Hall—Dad will pretend to be Bob Nesbitt, their neighbor’s son—and then they will set up the Nesbitt house for the five of them to stay in. Meanwhile, Miranda is trying to find a secure hiding place for her diaries when Alex interrupts her. He asks if Julie can borrow some clothes. He also notices all of Miranda’s books and admits that he misses reading. He sees a copy of Pride and Prejudice on her shelf and talks about the sin of pride. He talks about how, before the disaster, he decided—after a fight between his parents over money—that he would never be poor again. He worked hard, and he felt smart and proud. Now, he feels like nothing more than a beggar. Miranda can sense his despair.

Miranda and Dad successfully convince Mr. Danworth of City Hall to increase rations for the “Nesbitt” family. Miranda realizes that she is jealous of her father’s attachment to Alex and Julie. Later that week, Mr. Danworth comes by to meet the baby and check on the family. Everyone fawns over the baby, and Miranda understands that he represents hope for the future—not just for Dad and Lisa but for everyone.

Mom starts overseeing school lessons for Jon and Julie, though Miranda is aware that Jon’s real interest is in spending time with Julie. She decides to start clearing out Mrs. Nesbitt’s house so that she can have some time to herself. She is interrupted by the arrival of Syl and Julie; thus, she is pleased when Alex asks her to go searching through houses with him. She is thankful that he does not talk much.

However, Alex offends her when he suggests that they look in places other than the suburbs; he thinks there may be more left out in the countryside. Out of spite, Miranda takes them past the pile of bodies she discovered; they are now decaying rapidly in the warmer weather. She is further bothered by the fact that Alex seems to take in all of this without fear or sadness. It is simply the way the world is right now.

They do not have much luck at the first couple of farmhouses they encounter, though Miranda finds some paperback mysteries. Then, they stumble upon a farmhouse wherein the smell coming from the kitchen is overpowering. Miranda wants to move on, but Alex presses forward. They find the dead bodies of a man and his dog in the kitchen. Alex deduces that the man has something hidden somewhere, based on the fact that he did not kill his dog (the dog had been feeding on the man’s body before dying). They search the house, to no avail, but find a treasure trove of non-perishable foodstuffs in the barn, including four 20-pound bags of rice. They also find a van with a quarter tank of gas. After loading it up, they head home. When they return, everyone celebrates—and Miranda sees Alex smile for the first time.

Since some of the food is technically expired, Charlie suggests that everyone take on a “food buddy” to try a little bit from each can. If nobody gets sick, then that can is safe to eat. Miranda and Alex end up together in this endeavor, even though Alex annoys her. On Sunday, Dad’s group decides to observe the Sabbath and pray. Miranda and Mom decide to break down boxes.

Jon and Julie go into town for the weekly food rations. When they return—with a dozen bags of food—everyone is elated. This, along with the stash that Alex and Miranda discovered, means that they will have enough food for everyone, at least for a while. Mom decides to throw a kind of makeshift party. They enjoy soup and spinach; rice, shad, and green beans; and then some dried figs for dessert. Afterward, they play charades until Syl brings down her guitar. They try to remember the words to Beatles songs. Julie asks Syl if she could teach her how to play. When Syl says yes, Alex interrupts: It would be pointless because they are leaving in a few days. He insists that she go to the convent that their older brother, Carlos, suggested when they saw him down in Texas, where he is stationed with the Marines. Julie wants to stay, and they engage in a raucous fight.

When Dad and Lisa try to convince Alex that Julie could stay with them—she is family, they insist—Alex will not accept this. He says that only the church will be able to keep her safe. Julie runs outside, and Miranda follows her, bringing her a coat. Julie explains that since their parents are gone, Carlos is the authority. Alex will leave her at the convent, and then he will go on to Ohio where there is a monastery he will join. Charlie comes outside to coax them back into the house, and Julie notes that she misses the stars. The conversation veers toward the idea of life on other planets; they do not know about the suffering here on Earth, just as Miranda cannot know about their suffering elsewhere. At least they—Mom; her brothers; Dad, Lisa, and Gabriel; Charlie; and Alex and Julie—have survived, she thinks; at least this makeshift family is together.

The next day, Dad and his group move over to Mrs. Nesbitt’s house. Miranda feels like their house is now too quiet.

Lisa persuades Miranda to talk to Alex about not taking Julie away. Miranda is not very hopeful that she will have any success, but she agrees to try. Miranda and Alex go out looking for more supplies again, and this time, Miranda convinces him to stay in the suburbs. On the journey, Miranda brings up the subject, and Alex insists that they are leaving tomorrow. Miranda questions him about the logistics—and the logic—of his plan. Alex explains that he has seen far worse than Miranda has, back in New York City; he understands how slim their chances of survival are. He must save Julie, he thinks, and then he will join the monastery as penance for what he has done (which he does not relay to Miranda; see: Background). He begins to sob. Miranda convinces him to stay for the weekend; if he still insists on leaving, then they can do so on Tuesday, after the food pick-up on Monday.

Horton has quit eating, and Miranda fears the worst. She knows that Jon, in particular, will be devastated. Charlie stops by to invite them over to the Nesbitt house for Sunday prayers and dinner. Mom decides to stay behind, as she needs some time to herself, she says. After the dinner, Alex walks Miranda back to her house. He tells her that she “would have been [his] dream girl” in another world (149). She implores him to stay, but he will not budge on his plans. They kiss, and she walks the rest of the way home alone.

The next day, it begins to rain and never stops. Miranda is stuck in her house, so she does not know if Alex and Julie have left yet—surely, they will wait until the weather clears. It rains steadily for the following two days, after which the ground has turned into a muddy mess. Miranda and Matt have a fight over Alex leaving: Matt thinks that Alex is terrible at hard work, like chopping wood, and Miranda retaliates that Syl does not contribute much, either. The argument becomes so heated that Miranda fears that Matt may hit her. Mom intervenes, and Miranda runs outside, where she immediately runs into Alex. They kiss and hold each other, and Miranda begs him not to leave. He still refuses to hear her pleas.

Alex and Julie are staying, for now, because Julie has developed a cough. Alex insists that they will leave as soon as she is better. Miranda asks him why he feels the need to take her away from her makeshift family and leave her with strangers in the convent. She asks him why he is willing to sacrifice his relationship with her. Alex says that he refuses to allow Julie to suffer: He has squirrelled away some sleeping pills, and if the need arises, he will administer them to her and aide her death rather than let her suffer. While Miranda is appalled, she also understands.

Miranda dreams that Alex asks her to marry him. She begins to think that once Alex takes Julie somewhere that he believes is safe, he will come back to Miranda. When Alex drops by the next day to say that they are leaving the following day, Dad offers them the van; this infuriates Matt. Miranda points out that Alex found the van, and they decide that they will split the gas between them. Matt suggests that they siphon the gas into one of the more fuel-efficient cars available—but Mom has neglected to keep them operational, which, in turn, infuriates Dad. The entire group is fighting.

Once everyone calms down, it is decided that Dad will drive Alex and Julie to the convent. They will take the van, and Miranda will accompany them. Dad wants to spend some time with her. Miranda believes that this works to her advantage: Once Julie is safely ensconced at the convent, Alex will come back home to be with her.

When Miranda arrives at the Nesbitt house, she finds Lisa and Dad in a fight. Lisa is distraught that Dad is actually allowing Julie to leave. Lisa and Julie have formed a tight bond, and Lisa believes it is God’s will that the two stay together. However, Dad cannot circumvent Alex’s will; neither Alex nor Julie is his child to overrule.

After they set off, Miranda understands that in such an unstable world, she might never travel this far again. The van overheats several times during the journey, but they eventually make it to the convent. There are no girls there and no sanctuary. There is only one lone nun left behind, Sister Grace. She has been instructed not to take anyone else into the convent. Another nun has died in her bed, and they help bury her before they leave.

The van finally ceases to run when they are still 40 miles from home. They have given all their food supplies to the nun, and now they must endure two or three days of walking to get home. Dad tries to keep everyone’s spirits up, and they finally make it back—only to find that, while they were gone, Horton died.