The Husband's Secret

The scene of Cecilia and Tess in the kitchen switches to Cecilia’s point of view. She wonders what Tess would say if she confessed what John-Paul told her the night before but doesn’t say anything about it. She previously thought that Tess was “mysterious” and “self-assured,” but Tess’s careful manner in her kitchen makes her think perhaps Tess is shy instead. Tess asks about one of Esther’s books on the Berlin Wall, and Cecilia begins to babble. She realizes she’s talking too much but can’t seem to stop. She starts to imagine how Rachel Crowley feels—with her anger and grief—and feels sick to her stomach again. Tess comments that Cecilia has gone white, which Cecilia laughs off, saying she’s got a virus “or something. I’ve got something, that’s for sure” (238). 

Tess drops off Polly Fitzpatrick’s shoes at school, delivering them to Connor, who is outside preparing for his class. She remembers things about their relationship, like their first kiss on Clontarf Beach, as they mildly flirt. She also reflects on Liam’s relationship with his father and how Liam isn’t interested in sports, particularly football, despite his father’s great interest. As she leaves, she remembers that Felicity likes football as much as Will does. She suggests to Connor that they get a drink instead of a coffee. Connor asks if she’s available that evening. 

Cecilia breaks down crying in her pantry. She thinks maybe she came into the pantry just to be soothed by her organization and neatly stacked Tupperware. She smells sesame oil and thinks the bottle must be leaking or not have been wiped down properly when last used. She considers throwing it away but thinks about how she keeps it because John-Paul loves her sesame chicken. This leads to anger, as Cecilia thinks, “Who cared what John-Paul liked? The marital scales would never be even again. She had the upper hand and the last word forever” (244). When the doorbell rings, she goes to answer it and takes the sesame oil to throw away.

On the stoop is Virginia, John-Paul’s mother. Cecilia thinks about her difficult mother-in-law and prides herself on her ability to out-wife and out-mother Virginia’s criticisms. Virginia and Cecilia have a strange conversation in which it becomes clear that Virginia knows about the murder. Cecilia asks if Virginia remembers much about the murder. Virginia says she remembers it “very well” and mentions that the papers had a photograph of the rosary beads in Janie’s hand. Cecilia knows then that Virginia must have recognized her own rosary beads and never said anything. Virginia reminds Cecilia that “your family comes first” and says, “I don’t need to tell you this, do I? You’re a mother. You’d do anything for your children, just like I’d do anything for mine” (249). 

Rachel gets a phone call at work from Sergeant Bellach. He tells her that he’s turned the video over to the people to whom Janie’s open case is currently assigned. Rachel asks if they’ll interview Connor again, but Bellach cautions her against getting her hopes up. He says that someone from the Homicide Squad will be in touch with her that week. Rachel is frustrated by this news and reflects on how she’s always felt that “surely one day some respectable authority figure would take charge and put it right” (252). She wonders if that figure will ultimately be God, then dismisses that thought, thinking “God didn’t care. God couldn’t care less. God gave Connor Whitby free will, and Connor used that free will to strangle Janie” (252). Looking out the window, Rachel spots Tess laughing at something her mother is saying. She resents Connor Whitby for taking away the adult friendship she would have had with Janie. 

Tess goes out for drinks with Connor. They end up at a loud, crowded bar, where everyone looks to Tess as though they are still in high school. As they awkwardly try to make conversation over the noise, a former student of Connor’s bumps into them and enthusiastically sings Connor’s praises to his companions. He mistakes Tess for “Mrs. Whitby” and is trying to buy Connor a beer when Connor announces that they were just leaving. He leads Tess out of the bar by her hand and doesn’t release it once they’re outside. Tess thinks about whether or not this is cheating, and about how her own sexual history is “unimpeachable. […] She’d always done the right thing. Why? For what? Who cared?” (259). She feels the thrill of holding hands with Connor and thinks about how this wild shot of desire and newness was what Will was feeling with Felicity while Tess was just boring and married.

The chapter ends with a flashback to June 1987. In Berlin, Ronald Reagan delivers his famous “tear down this wall!” speech. In Sydney, Tess’s parents talk about Lucy having committed adultery. Andrew, Tess’s father, says that it’s not that he doesn’t forgive Lucy, it’s that he doesn’t care. Lucy says she only had the affair to get his attention, but, of course, he’s “already looking past her, at the door” (260).