The Drowning Woman

“The drowning woman notices and invites me under the blanket. It feels strangely intimate, but I’m too cold to refuse.”

The reference to the novel’s title in this passage uses a vivid image of the two shivering women whose lives are quite different on the surface but who come into close proximity because of the near drowning. This foreshadows their unlikely friendship, which is a key theme throughout the novel.

“When we are dressed, we catch our reflections in the bank of mirrors running above the row of sinks. Hazel is wearing my jeans, T-shirt, jacket, and cap. Only the shoes are her own, expensive black trainers two sizes too small for me. I am dressed in pricey spandex, an oversized hoodie, worn black running shoes on my feet. The resemblance is astonishing. From a distance, we are virtually interchangeable.”

One of the novel’s themes is Friendship and Circumstance Superseding Class Distinctions. This passage provides a visual example of how Lee and Hazel are similar despite their differing outward circumstances. Emphasizing their physical resemblance are the words “virtually interchangeable.” The switching of clothes symbolizes how circumstances are changeable and often without reason.

“I turn away to admire the room that Hazel decorated: the low lacquered coffee table strategically covered in books on architecture and archaeology; a sterling silver bust of a woman—something ominous in her limbless form—perched on a marble plinth. For a moment, I imagine I really am Hazel, the tragic heroine caught between beauty and ugliness. Between privilege and abuse.”

The novel characterizes Lee through her empathy. She imagines herself as Hazel, not out of jealousy for Hazel’s privileged circumstances but because she understands that her friend feels trapped and is being abused. Settings are a significant aspect of the novel, conveying its thematic concern with class and circumstance. The opulence of Hazel and Benjamin’s home suggests not only their wealth but, in the bust of a woman’s torso that catches Lee’s eye, also the abuse that takes place there.

“This information should have dissuaded me, but it didn’t. I wasn’t into kink, per se, but I was sexually adventurous, curious. I envisioned harmless Fifty Shades of Grey stuff: bondage, blindfolds, playful spanking. And when I went home with him that night, that’s exactly how it was. Marielle’s friend was just too vanilla for a man like Benjamin Laval.”

The allusion to E. L. James’s popular novel Fifty Shades of Grey, about a BDSM relationship, increases verisimilitude since the novel takes place in the same city. In addition, the allusion differentiates The Drowning Woman from Fifty Shades of Grey because Hazel dismisses its topic as much different from her life. Though both books include themes of sexual power and references to BDSM relationships, they differ in genre and approach.

“When the pandemic hit, the governor issued stay-at-home orders. For two months, my husband worked from his home office while I tried to stay out of his way. Domestic abuse rose worldwide during lockdown and my husband was no exception. Benjamin took his fear, his sense of powerlessness, and his frustrations out on me. And with no one to see the bruises, the violence escalated. I took it—I had no choice—but my resignation seemed to increase his disdain. By the time we emerged back into the world, my husband had grown to hate me.”

The novel’s description of the world during the COVID-19 pandemic roots it in the contemporary era and helps make it relatable. In addition, it establishes the far-reaching effects of the pandemic and isolation. This builds on the economic devastation of the pandemic that is evident in Lee’s description of her restaurant’s failure. Most importantly, this passage highlights the global problem of domestic abuse and emphasizes that Hazel’s situation isn’t unique.

“When I was alone in my bathroom (one of the only rooms in the house without a camera), I wrote a suicide note.

Benjamin,

To say you have made my life hell for the past six years would be an understatement. I can see no way out and no way forward. Your cruelty and abuse have driven me to this. I can’t live another day as your slave.

Goodbye, Hazel.

My husband would be enraged. It was the ultimate betrayal. The ultimate humiliation. And the ultimate loss of control.”

Hazel’s words address the novel’s theme of Toxic Power Dynamics in Relationships. Hazel reflects that Benjamin will be furious about her death by suicide, not because of any grief for her but because it would betray the dynamic in which he wields power over her. Though she doesn’t actually intend to die at this point, her suicide note emphasizes the bleakness of her situation: Her options for taking control back from Benjamin are extremely limited given his power.

“That should have been the last I saw of Lee, but it wasn’t. She was stuck in my mind like a song, and nothing I did could dislodge her. I felt sorry for her, of course, but there was something more. A sort of kinship. Because none of my friendships were real, all forced upon me by my husband. I played a part with everyone in my life. Even Jesse. But with Lee, I could be open. I could just be Hazel.”

The simile of Lee being stuck in Hazel’s mind “like a song” suggests that their connection is both strong and unavoidable. It emphasizes the novel’s theme of Friendship and Circumstance Superseding Class Distinctions because it highlights their kinship and Hazel’s feeling that she can be herself with Lee in a way that none of her other relationships allow.

“And so I turned off my guilt, pushed it down so deep that I couldn’t feel it, and I went to the beach as instructed. Lee was there, just like Jesse said she’d be. I listened as she told me about the guy she’d met, watched her face light up. And then I told me how Benjamin treated me, showed her my bruises. I didn’t even have to lie to her. I asked her to help me escape. The plan was in motion.”

Although Jesse’s real identity as Carter isn’t evident yet, the novel provides increasing clues that he isn’t who he says he is. This passage reveals the irony that Hazel’s attempts to escape Benjamin’s control led her to become involved with another man who is attempting to control her for his own ends. That she must ignore her guilt at Jesse’s suggestion shows that Hazel is bending to Jesse’s will because she’s so used to being controlled rather than making her own choices.

“‘That woman could be dangerous.’ ‘I don’t think so,’ I said with a dismissive laugh. ‘Did she follow you here?’ ‘Oh my god…’ The fear on my face must have looked genuine, because Laurie continued. ‘She could be scoping out homes in your neighborhood. Or she could be deranged.’ ‘I never thought of that.’ Concern fluttered across my face. They clocked it, just like I wanted them to. ‘You should call the police,’ Laurie said. Vanessa added, ‘Be careful, Hazel. You can’t be friends with someone like that.’ We hugged efficiently and went our separate ways.”

This passage is an important example of how Hazel’s telling of a scene that Lee described in Part 1 transforms through Hazel’s point of view. Hazel doesn’t want to raise Vanessa and Laurie’s suspicions that “that woman” is her friend lest it get back to Benjamin. In addition, the novel highlights the superficiality of Hazel’s relationship with Vanessa and Laurie with the word “efficiently” to describe their hug.

“Jealousy churned my stomach, sent a sick taste into my throat. Jesse had lied to me. He had cheated on me. The infidelity hurt more than any of Benjamin’s physical abuse. But when I looked at Lee, I felt something else. Self-loathing. Because I hated what we were doing to her, how we were playing her. And pity. She was as desperate to feel loved as I was.”

This passage represents Hazel’s character trajectory. As a reprieve from Benjamin, she turns to Jesse, but she doesn’t initially realize that he’s repeating the pattern of hurting and abusing her. In addition, the passage emphasizes the conflict that Hazel feels about using Lee, whom she cares about and feels an affinity with, to achieve her own freedom. This moment is especially significant as a clue of how strongly Hazel feels about Lee: She pities and empathizes with Lee even though she just learned that she’s sleeping with a man she loves.

“But it worked. When I removed my sunglasses in the spa parking lot, Lee was horrified by my injured face, my traumatized demeanor. When I asked her to come into my house, to set me free, she agreed. The money and the new identification were secondary. She was scared for me. She felt compelled to save me. And in return, I would send her to jail for a murder she hadn’t committed. But it was the only way I could be free of one man to start over with another. A man who would do anything for me. Even kill for me. The same man who had just punched me in the face.”

As the novel progresses, clues about Jesse’s real character become more frequent and emphatic. Jesse’s act of physical violence emphasizes the similarity between him and Benjamin. In addition, this passage exemplifies how new information from Hazel’s perspective transforms a repeated scene. Whereas Lee sees signs of Hazel’s abuse and pities her, Hazel’s thoughts reveal that Jesse actually punched her and that Hazel’s bid for freedom involves Lee herself.

“The ocean was black but for the lights of the mansions glimmering off the surface. A spit of craggy rocks jutted out into the Pacific, and I tentatively picked my way across them. It was risky in the darkness, but I wouldn’t use my flashlight. I couldn’t draw attention to myself. When I reached the final rock, I took the knife from my bag and with a strong overhand throw, I chucked it into the sea. A brief sensation of peace settled over me. I was protecting my friend. I still had a moral compass, however askew.”

This passage shows the key turning point for Hazel’s character trajectory. Rather than doing what Jesse says and stashing the knife in her house, she throws it into the ocean. This is her first action in the novel that is fully her own choice and not influenced by either Benjamin or Jesse. Significantly, it takes place at the beach, where several other key moments in her journey and relationship with Lee occur.

“Somehow, I didn’t scream. I stepped back, slipping in the blood again, but I didn’t go down this time. Jesse. My Jesse. Why was he in Hazel’s home? Why was he dead? His blood was still wet, which meant my boyfriend had been killed recently. But by whom? And then I heard that noise again. Something, someone was outside. A killer. A cop. The security guard. Whoever it was, I could not be there, at the scene of the crime. I was a homeless person, inside a mansion, with a dead body.”

First-person narration emphasizes Lee’s emotional turmoil upon finding Jesse stabbed to death. The passage includes several very short sentences, which reflect Lee’s quick pace of thinking and her panic as she tries to make sense of the possibilities. In addition, she quickly realizes that she must leave.

“Hazel’s warning runs through my mind. Jesse is not who you think he is. ‘Neither were you, Hazel,’ I mutter to myself. I know I can’t trust her, but those words ring true. Something in this apartment will tell me who Jesse really was. And why he was murdered. I will find it, but I have to hurry.”

This passage characterizes Lee as curious and determined to find out what happened to Jesse. Like Hazel, she begins to assert increasing agency throughout the novel. Her choices often involve searching for the truth, and this passage foreshadows her later similar choices to try to uncover what happened.

“As I wait, I think about the man who answered the phone. The man who knew my name, who asked where I was. I know that I’m in danger now. There’s no doubt. So why am I risking my safety to talk to Jesse’s brother? What am I hoping to find?”

Internal rhetorical questions emphasize the tension between Lee’s desire for freedom (and her need to remove herself from danger) and her curiosity to understand why Jesse was killed and who he really was. Lee’s questions emphasize that she doesn’t fully understand her own actions. Her internal conversation with herself reflects the complexity of her situation.

“‘My own baby brother hung me out to dry. And it didn’t bother him a bit.’ I think about Teresa. Her anger toward me that will never dissipate. ‘You must really hate him,’ I say. ‘Carter was always weak. His lawyer manipulated him. Convinced him that turning on me was the only way to save himself. The person I really hate is Benjamin Laval.’”

This passage is significant to the novel’s plot because it reveals the connection between Carter and Benjamin Laval, which neither Lee nor Hazel yet understands. That Lee thinks about her sister when hearing about Carter’s betrayal of his brother, Sean, highlights the guilt that she still feels about her actions.

“Because Carter’s voice is not the only one captured here. Now I know that I am in greater danger than I ever realized. Even with Carter gone, I am not safe. Because the other voice is that of a murderer too. And if that person finds out I have heard these recordings, I will be killed.”

Lee realizes that Benjamin hired Jesse (Carter) to kill Hazel. However, the novel obscures details about both who Carter is speaking to and what they’re talking about. The omission of gendered pronouns and details sustains tension and suspense. The novel doesn’t reveal these details until much later, when Hazel learns them.

“The manager, Greta Williams, a birdlike woman drowning in a chunky cardigan, leads me to a back garden where my mother is seated in a cushioned chair. She is facing a wild rosebush, the fragrance wafting toward me as I approach. Fat bumblebees flit between the pink blossoms, and my mom watches them, rapt. When I look at her face, I see a small, contented smile. This is why I stayed with Benjamin, why I signed his contract and followed his rules. My mother is at peace here, maybe even happy. Despite all she has lost—her memories, her identity, her daughter—she is comfortable and cared for.”

Sensory and visual details about the garden emphasize the importance of this moment of goodbye for Hazel. Her devotion to her mother and self-sacrificial attitude are important elements of her character throughout the novel. The last sentence of the passage uses syntactical structure, positioning the list of her mother’s losses within the parenthetical dashes and using asyndeton, to emphasize the dichotomy between the significant losses and her current comfort.

“I hang up the phone and move to the window. The police car is still there. Surely if Benjamin is my only threat, they will call it off. Resources are limited, police stretched too thin. It is a never-ending story in the news. But the car doesn’t move. I watch it, arms folded around myself, for seconds, then minutes. I leave, make more tea, return to the window. The car is still there. So why are the cops leaving the officer outside my home when Benjamin is being held in jail? Because they don’t think I’m safe either.”

Hazel’s thought process and subtle movements build tension throughout this passage. The specificity of Hazel’s thoughts about police resources and her movements to and from the window emphasize the contrast between her panicked state of mind and her inability to effect change in her circumstances.

“‘I don’t want this to look like an intentional overdose. And this is more than enough to make her weak and groggy,’ Benjamin assures him. ‘When she’s starting to nod off, toss her in. The water’s cold.’ I hear the smile in his voice. ‘Hazel will never wake up.’ I reach for the wastepaper basket and vomit into it. Lee saved my life that day. I thought she’d disrupted my plan, destroyed my future, but if I had gotten into that boat with Jesse, I’d be dead. I am only alive because of her.”

This passage reveals that Benjamin and Jesse planned Hazel’s murder. Ironically, the interpretation of the near drowning shifts throughout the novel: It first seems to be an attempted death by suicide when Lee saves Hazel’s life; it then seems to be an escape attempt that Lee inadvertently foiled. Eventually, it’s clear that Lee saved Hazel from a murder plot. Benjamin’s role complicates his character, indicating the same vindictive streak as his actions after his divorce from his first wife: actions out of spite rather than for gain. Given his complete control over Hazel, it’s never entirely clear what he wanted to achieve by having her killed.

“‘All we can do now is cross our fingers and wait,’ she adds. My life is on the line, and she is suggesting I rely on crossed fingers? But Rachelle knows. I am powerless over my fate. I always was.”

Rachelle initially appears to be confident in fighting for Hazel but gradually begins to lose faith in both her client and their chances of beating Benjamin. This passage indicates her and Hazel’s lack of power over Benjamin in light of his influence. The triviality of crossed fingers and Rachelle’s loss of ferocity and confidence in their ability to make a legal argument against Benjamin emphasize Hazel’s feeling of powerlessness.

“For the next two nights, I don’t sleep. My body feels coiled and restless, like my skin is too small, like my insides are being slowly, invisibly crushed. My mother has still not been found. She has been gone for three nights and the thought of her trapped, alone, and afraid makes me cry for hours. I worry and fret and stew over my lack of agency and freedom.”

This passage marks a shift in Hazel’s feelings about her agency and freedom. Whereas her ability to improve her mother’s life previously depended on her entrapment, the fact that she now isn’t allowed to leave her house prevents her from searching for her mother. The simile of her skin being too small provides a visceral, physical description of Hazel’s distraught state of mind.

“In the distance, I hear the gentle babble of the creek and I move toward the sound. Eventually, I come across an offshoot from the path, overgrown and barely noticeable, and I cut deeper into the undergrowth. Blackberry bushes grab at my clothes, try to scratch my skin but I push through until I emerge into a small clearing. The creek is little more than a trickle now, not the rushing brook of my childhood. But I remember this place. My mom and I had picnicked here a handful of times. It was never fancy—ham and American cheese sandwiches, a bag of chips, and a couple of sodas—but it had been special for us. A treat. When we were here, we didn’t worry about bills or money or keeping up with our friends and neighbors. We’d talked and we’d laughed, and we’d enjoyed each other’s company. A cob of grief—and of relief—erupts from my chest. My mom escaped from the nursing home and came her of her own volition. Somehow, I know it. She has grasped that wisp of a memory, and she chose this spot to lie down and go. Benjamin didn’t take her. He didn’t kill her. My mother had a peaceful death, surrounded by nature, beauty, and happy memories, no matter how diluted.”

Thoughts of Benjamin’s mercurial character create tension after Hazel’s mother disappears. While he’s clearly capable of evil actions, his motivations and priorities for violence aren’t always evident. Hazel's realization that her mother came to the clearing of her own volition is an important moment of catharsis.