Take My Hand

Civil is in the Ralseys’ law office with her father, Ty, and Alicia, where they discuss filing a lawsuit against the clinic. Civil’s father believes a lawsuit is possible, but it will be tough. When the Ralseys agree to file one, they tell Civil and Alicia to keep the lawsuit secret and to work as if nothing happened.

When Civil and Alicia leave the Ralseys’ office, Alicia is supposed to take Civil home, but Civil insists on going to the Williamses’ apartment. They argue about the situation at the clinic—Civil says she can’t go back to work, and Alicia says she has to go back. Alicia admonishes Civil for the pressure she puts on herself and her overwrought sense of responsibility.

The girls are distant when Civil arrives at the apartment. She and Mrs. Williams talk, and Mrs. Williams reveals she distrusted Civil from the beginning. She reminds Civil of their socioeconomic differences—Civil believes things can always work out while the Williamses know that everything can be taken from them at any time. Civil looks to Mrs. Williams for absolution, but instead she gets cold censure.

When the Roe v. Wade decision came out in January 1973, the whole world was stunned. Civil remembers wondering what her father thought about the decision, believing that surely he realized there needed to be a safe way for women to get an abortion. She remembers in the days after her procedure, which was done before the Roe decision, she vacillated between guilt for not taking better precautions and anger at having to “climb up on a plastic sheet-covered bed in a stranger’s house” (157) to have the procedure.

In 1973, Civil goes to church with her mother, hoping to sort things out about her abortion and what happened to the girls. She thinks about what Black churches mean to the people of Montgomery. During the service, she and her mother are called to stand, and she feels a unity with the congregation, like her struggle belongs to her whole church family.

The Ralseys insist Civil and Alicia go back to work and pretend everything is normal. Everyone at the clinic knows what happened to the girls, but none of them knows about the pending lawsuit. Civil and Alicia have warned some of the nurses about Depo-Provera’s risks and hope they have also stopped administering the shot. Civil and Alicia also know it is just a matter of time until someone else is sterilized.

Mrs. Seager calls Civil into her office and asks if she thinks she is a good fit for the job. When Civil mentions the girls’ surgery, Mrs. Seager blames Civil for the action because she moved the girls to a place where they would have easier access to boys. When Civil protests that the girls had never had sex, Mrs. Seager implies that Mace could sexually assault them. When Civil bursts out, “You sterilized two innocent little girls!” (162), Mrs. Seager says she obtained consent and accuses Civil of insubordination.

Ms. Ralsey informs Civil she is handing the case to Lou Feldman, a young white lawyer, so she can join a team of lawyers representing some men affected by the Tuskegee syphilis experiments. Civil is angry and states that of course a little Black girl’s life isn’t worth as much as a man’s.

Meeting Lou, Civil questions him about the family and their situation. He proves he has done his homework and knows who the family is, even knowing details about the family she does not. She is still angry that he is white, and she tells him they are not looking for a white Jesus. He replies he does not intend to be one, and she reluctantly agrees to him taking the case, as long as the Ralseys are included. When he gives her his home and office number, he says his wife, a lawyer in Selma, is proud of what Civil has done.

Civil visits Mace when he gets of work, and he is still angry at her. She tells him she wants nothing but the best for the girls, and he tells her she’s a little rich girl who plays around with people’s lives. Then he pulls her close and says he wants to hate her, but he realizes she is as torn up as he is about what happened. He says she reminds him of the girls’ mother. There is a moment of sexual tension, but he breaks it by pushing her aside.

The morning the lawsuit is announced in the paper, Civil finds her mother lying on the floor of her studio. As Civil helps her sit up, she thinks of how beautiful her mother is, how good her paintings are, and whether her mother being Black contributed to her lack of success as an artist.

Civil cannot bring herself to go to work, so she drives the Williams family to see relatives out of town. These are the girls’ mother’s relatives, and the family has not been to visit since Constance died. On the car ride, Mace feels empowered, and Mrs. Williams relaxes. When they arrive, Civil is welcomed like family and Nellie, Constance’s cousin, hugs her. She notes the difference between these folks and her family, which is not a “hugging family” (177). The people and place exude warmth, and Nellie feeds them well.

Civil enjoys the visit and compares her family with this experience—while the Williams family is large and affectionate, hers is small and undemonstrative.

The idyllic dinner experience is broken when the girls’ uncle mentions the news of the lawsuit, pulling out the day’s newspaper. The family argues about how it could have happened; some blame Mace while others do not. Civil realizes everyone at the table is hurting and she does not belong there, but she sees no way to escape the situation. Everyone at the table has a story about the difficulty and intrusion involved in getting any help from the government. Nellie says, “Them white folks give you that assistance and then act like they own you” (183).

Civil reads the newspaper article and realizes everyone is named—the clinic, Mrs. Seager, the doctor who performed the surgery, and her as their nurse. The family wonders if there will be money coming, and Civil explains this lawsuit is meant to keep the procedure from happening again. They all vow to support the girls and the family. Civil thinks about the lawsuit and all the unknowns, hoping it doesn’t just end up being another case of “white folks meddling” (184) with them. On the drive home, Mace blames himself, despite Civil’s assurances, and he notes the futility of their lives.

Civil takes India to her new school, where Sister LaTarsha, meets them. The nun is Black, which surprises Civil. As the three of them tour the school, the nun explains to Civil how the school meets each individual student’s needs and introduces India to some of the activities. Sister LaTarsha emphasizes that India must attend regularly, or she’ll lose her spot, which concerns Civil.

The nun asks about the lawsuit and conveys concern for Civil, saying loving too hard is dangerous, and she must take care of herself: “You can’t help others if you’re down and out. I have to remind myself of that all the time” (190).

Later, Civil meets with Lou about the case and tells him that Mrs. Seager has fired her. Civil finds it painful to read the complaint. She wonders whether Alicia and Val betrayed her to Mrs. Seager, and she wonders why Alicia has not contacted her since she was fired.

Civil asks Lou why he took the case, and he says not all white people hate Black people. She denies saying that, and as they sort through each other’s words, she tries to explain what it means to be a Black person in Montgomery. She recounts what it was like in 1963 when she was 13 and George Wallace was elected governor—the violence against Black people, and how her father put himself in danger when he treated an injured white woman.

She explains she is worried for Lou’s safety—telling him it’s not safe for a white person to help a Black person. He affirms that she can trust him, and she realizes Lou still believes in the goodness of the world, but she lost her belief the day the girls were sterilized.

As present-day Civil arrives in Montgomery to meet with Lou, she tells Anne that she must think that Lou was just another white savior. She responds that “We are at the center of our own destiny” (195) and that Black people have fought, using every available resource. Lou Feldman was a resource although she grew to love him as a person.

When she sees Lou, they catch up on their lives. They talk about the case, justice, and morality, and she realizes they have different memories about the case. She wishes she could only remember parts of the case like he does, but she remembers every detail.

Ty, Alicia, and Civil are at Civil’s house, talking about the case. Civil confronts Alicia, who admits that she is the one who told Mrs. Seager that Civil helped the family get a new place and took the girls off birth control. Civil tells Alicia everything is her fault, and Alicia says she felt she had no choice. They talk about getting the other nurses at the clinic to help find other women and girls who have been sterilized.

While they talk, Lou calls Civil and tells her Senator Ted Kennedy has heard about the case. Lou says he, Civil, and the family need to go to Washington, DC, to testify before a congressional committee. Civil helps the Williamses to prepare for the trip to Washington, and the girls are anxious about flying. Civil hopes it will be a good experience.