Swimming in the Dark

In America, Ludwik watches the news, seeing that the government backlash against Solidarność is growing worse. He wonders if Janusz is involved. He tries calling Granny, but as usual, the call does not go through. He writes a letter instead, knowing that it will be read before it ever reaches her. He remembers being a child, and his mother and Granny going into his mother’s room alone every night and leaving him out, saying that he was too young to join them. When his mother finds him crying over Beniek, she lets him listen to Radio Free Europe, a Western and anti-communist broadcast, with them. Through the radio and his family, Ludwik learns of the long history of Jewish persecution in Poland and realizes that Beniek will never return.

As Ludwik continues to learn more about the history and politics of his country, he comes to distrust the system of communism and the Russians, though he continues to play the part of a faithful student at school. Ludwik wonders if Janusz’s beliefs were always the opposite of his. Ludwik knows that when Warszawa rose up against the Nazis, the Russians waited across the river as the Nazis destroyed the city. He believes Janusz is ignorant of this fact and likely believes that Russians are the saviors and liberators of Poland from the Nazis.

While at the lake, Ludwik asks Janusz if he has a girlfriend, and he tells him that he does not anymore and that he prefers Ludwik anyway. As they leave, they are unsure of what comes next, but Janusz warns Ludwik that this must be kept secret, even if both of them want it to continue. They return to Warszawa and Ludwik moves back in with his landlady, Pani Kolecka, who sleeps on the couch so he can have his own room. Ludwik lives in the part of the city that once contained the Ghetto, meaning that an entire history razed to the ground by the Nazis is beneath his feet. Janusz, meanwhile, lives on the opposite end of the city, where the Russians once waited and watched the city burn.

Janusz and Ludwik see each other often, walking through the city and telling each other about their families. Janusz finds a job in the Office of Press Control, where he will read unpublished material to ensure that no pro-Western or anti-Party sentiments are published. Ludwik disapproves of this job, claiming that it is censorship, and they argue over the system of communism. Ludwik hints that he wants to leave Poland, while Janusz wants to stay, seeing merits and believing that they can build a life together.

One day, Ludwik goes to visit Karolina at her apartment across the city, where she tells him of her new, disappointing job as a secretary. She wants to be a divorce lawyer, but all of the spots are filled. Ludwik sympathizes with her and shares that he now wants to pursue a PhD. She asks him about his trip with Janusz and tells him that he can tell her. He hides his anger at this hint at his sexuality and she comments that he seems different after the trip. Before leaving, he assures her that her new job is temporary, and she reminds him that they can always escape together, as she has connections through an uncle in Chicago.

Ludwik visits Professor Mielewicz and tells him that he will pursue a PhD. The professor is excited and warns him not to choose a topic that is pro-West, as the application process is very competitive, and he wants Ludwik to be approved. He gives Ludwik a week to write a proposal before they review it together and submit it. Ludwik wants to write about Giovanni’s Room but laments that the novel is banned. He does however find an approach to analyzing James Baldwin’s work in an anti-capitalist, anti-American way, focusing on the country’s history of racism. As he works on the proposal, Pani Kolecka tells him of the growing queues and rising meat prices, making it harder for them to afford good meals.

Ludwik visits Janusz’s apartment. They kiss but begin to argue when Ludwik pushes back against Janusz’s blind faith in the government’s decision to raise meat prices. When Ludwik suggests he pick Janusz up from his first day at work the following day, Janusz warns against it, not wanting to give the impression that they are together. He tells Ludwik of how when Foucault visited the USSR, the government used his homosexual identity to send him home in shame and damage his image. This upsets Ludwik, who asks why they must live in fear, but Janusz says that he is not afraid and just wants to be cautious. Over the next week, Ludwik works on his proposal and walks around the city with summer waning. Pani Kolecka soon falls ill with a bad cough, and Ludwik cannot find any medicine for her anywhere.