Sons and Lovers

In the spring, Paul is still wary of physical contact with Miriam, struggling with the idea that he should be in love with her. Paul studies other men whom he knows to be virgins and inexperienced romantically. They share his history of being born to mothers who suffered at their husbands’ hands. Like Paul, these men would rather suffer “the misery of celibacy” than risk hurting a woman who reminds them of their mother (257). Gertrude notices that Paul is going to Miriam more often. When he arrives home late, she is unimpressed. Paul wants to tell Miriam about the inner conflict he feels; he speaks to her, wondering whether the time has come for him to marry and whether he has been “too fierce” in his purity (259). They kiss, and Paul embraces Miriam. Though he would like to do more than kiss her, she tells him “not now” (261). Miriam is apprehensive about this new physical boundary they have crossed but then seizes Paul by the arms and tells him that he “shall have [her]” (261). To Miriam, the thought of submitting to Paul sexually is almost like a religious sacrifice.

During the ensuing courtship, Paul makes romantic overtures toward Miriam and encourages their physical intimacy, but she always stops him. She wants to be loved from afar for now, rather than physically desired. One day, while they pick cherries together, Paul embraces her when they are hidden behind a row of trees. Though she feels somewhat horrified, Miriam decides to give herself to Paul. They have sex, but afterward, Miriam feels as though she was not a part of the act, as though her soul was watching from the side.

When Miriam’s grandmother falls ill, Miriam goes to care for her. Miriam’s grandmother is taken to Derby for treatment, and for the two days she is away, Miriam stays in her cottage. Paul comes to the cottage, where they spend time together almost as though they are “man and wife” (266). After cooking together, they go into the bedroom and have sex. That night, Paul returns home feeling as though he has somehow passed into adulthood. Over the coming weeks, Paul continues to visit Miriam while her grandmother is away. Each time they have sex, however, Paul feels as though he is reconfiguring the way he thinks about Miriam. After each encounter, he feels a terrible sense of “failure and of death” (267). Though Miriam assures Paul that she wants to be with him, she says that the only way that she can become accustomed to their physical intimacy is if they marry. Miriam was told by her mother that sex is a “dreadful” burden to be endured (267), and she continues to believe this. Now, however, she feels a desire to start a family and have children. Paul proposes to Miriam, but she insists that they are still too young to be married. Paul is confused by Miriam’s mixed emotions. He speaks to his mother, saying that he will spend less time in Miriam’s company. His loyalty to Miriam endures, but he can never quite capture the spark of passion that he felt for her on one occasion. This inability to recapture the moment of passion makes Paul feel like a failure.

Paul is seeing Clara less and less. As he still remains confused about Miriam, he spends more time with his male friends. At work, however, he sketches Clara while she goes about her duties. Miriam finds the sketches, which only makes Paul annoyed that she is searching through his possessions. In his mind, Miriam takes emotionally and offers him “nothing” in return (270). To Paul, she lacks a sense of life, as she is only his conscience rather than his “mate” (270). He begins to spend more time with Clara. He speaks to his mother, sharing his plans to end his relationship with Miriam. While taking a Sunday walk, Paul tells Miriam that he does not want to marry her and wishes to end their relationship. As much as Miriam is surprised, she loathes the love she feels for Paul since it has become almost overpowering. Paul dominated her, she believes, and she tried to resist. Their relationship, she says, has been a long battle rather than anything based on true love. In turn, Paul accuses Miriam of toying with him. He was sincere in everything he told her, he claims, but their relationship is broken, nonetheless. Miriam claims that the relationship has failed because Paul wants “something else” (274). Paul believes that Miriam despised him while pretending that she loved him. This has caused him to hate her, he says. In turn, Miriam resents Paul for being untrue and cruel. Together, they agree to avoid one another as much as possible. While returning home, Paul feels an urge to stop and drink in a bar. While he drinks, four girls approach him and offer him chocolates. Paul stays with the girls, laughing with them. Later, he returns home and tells his mother what happened. Meanwhile, Miriam is alone, “waiting” (276).

Paul’s artistic career is succeeding to the point where he is earning good money by selling textile designs and paintings. Since he ended the relationship with Miriam, Gertrude loves her son even more. As well as hiring a girl named Minnie as a servant for his mother, Paul takes Gertrude on vacation to the Isle of Wight. All the walking, however, causes her to suffer from “a bad fainting bout” (278). During this period, Paul increases the amount of time he spends with Clara. As they wait for a train one day, he holds her hand. The following day, Paul tells Clara that his relationship with Miriam is over. He kisses her fingers, and when they meet the following Monday, he brings flowers to pin to her coat. They walk together, holding hands. As they pass along the riverbank, they kiss passionately. The flowers pinned to Clara’s coat are crushed as they roll around on the ground. They then go somewhere to drink tea.

Paul speaks about Clara with his mother, who is concerned about gossip in the community surrounding Clara’s failed marriage. Paul wants his mother to meet Clara. When he goes to church the following Sunday, he sees Miriam. As they walk together, he tells her about his relationship with Clara. Even though Clara is still technically married to her estranged husband, they are not together. Clara’s husband is in a different relationship. This is not a freedom that is open to Clara, Miriam suggests, but Paul does not agree. Some time later, Miriam suggests to Paul that Clara’s marriage is “something like [Paul’s] mother and father” (291). Paul disagrees, explaining to Miriam that his mother once loved his father. Passion, he believes, brings people together. Miriam understands the importance of passion to Paul, believing that he will not be able to marry anyone until he feels passionate about them. Once Paul gets whatever passion he wants from Clara, Miriam believes, he will no longer be interested in Clara. Miriam hopes that she and Paul will then reunite. When Paul says that Clara is invited to meet his mother, Miriam suggests that she may pass by to see her friend. This angers Paul, though he says nothing.

When Clara visits the Morel family home, Gertrude receives her warmly. Paul shows Clara photographs of his family amid a friendly atmosphere. Even Walter seems courteous, and Clara seems entertained by him. Paul and Clara walk together in the garden afterward. Miriam arrives and sees how closely together Paul and Clara are standing. She believes that Clara has been “accepted [by Paul’s family] as she had never been” (297). She leaves, feeling bitter, assuring herself that Paul is still somehow hers to possess. Miriam is angry that Clara has so smoothly slipped into a place that should rightfully be hers. When Paul hears Clara talking critically about Miriam with Gertrude, he is also angry. Later, Clara raises the subject of Miriam with Paul. He reiterates his position that they are “only” friends (300). Clara steps back from Paul, but, as he feels overcome by passion, he seizes Clara and begins to kiss her repeatedly. They spend so long like this that they almost miss the train that Clara insists on taking home.

Some days later, Paul invites Clara to the theater. He wants to see an “old and famous” French actress named Sarah Bernhardt (303), who is known for her flamboyant performances. Clara agrees on the proviso that Paul wear a suit. He picks her up and is thrilled to see her dressed in a semi-formal gown. Paul stares at her beauty, entranced by the shape of her body. During the performance, he clings to her hand and kisses her along the arm. After the play ends, Paul misses his train. Clara invites him to her house, where he is welcomed by her mother, who jokes about their formal clothing. Paul eats with Clara’s mother and then plays cribbage with Clara while her mother watches over them closely. During their card game, Clara plays with her wedding ring. Clara will share her mother’s bed while Paul sleeps in Clara’s room. Paul lays in bed and waits for Clara’s mother to fall asleep. When he is confident that she is asleep, he sneaks down and finds Clara in front of the kitchen hearth. They sit beside each other, which helps Clara to restore her long-lost “joy and pride” (310). However, she will not go up to the bedroom with him, so Paul sleeps alone. The following morning, he speaks about his love of art while they eat breakfast. Clara’s mother is well inclined toward Paul, who suggests that he could rent a cottage near the sea for them all to vacation together. Mrs. Radford turns down the offer, seemingly leaving Paul and Clara free to enjoy their vacation together. Paul is thrilled.