Soldier X

X slowly learns the names of the other men—Mikhos and Boris—and learns from them and Nikolai that he is in Alreni, 40 kilometers from Tarnapol. He makes very minor mistakes in his Russian, but nobody seems to notice. X adjusts to the routine at the hospital, including that they relieve themselves in German helmets for bedpans and that the two doctors keep the men as long as possible to help as extra hands around the hospital rather than sending them back to the front.

There are several nurses on staff—Zoya, a harsh woman, her beautiful blond niece Katerina, and their ward Tamara, who catches X’s eye. There is also Lina, Marusia, and male orderly Rubin, as well as the permanent male orderlies Blad and Oleg, and the guard, a disabled man named Sergo.

X soon grows bored at the hospital, as the city is mostly bombed out and empty, and the men have little to do except talk, and he has nothing to talk about. To make up for this, the men try to guess where he is from, deciding on Silesia or Odessa due to his accent and blond hair. X grows homesick and more unstable, but Nikolai keeps him sane, serving as a father figure and even giving him his name—X—when he tells him how much he hates the name Aleksandr.

X describes the disturbing conditions of other patients in the ward—an unconscious man who makes rowing motions with his arms for hours before his death, who is replaced by a near-silent man paralyzed from the neck down. X feels deep empathy for this man, even though they never speak.

Later, X learns that the hospital is going to be inspected by the government to weed out any soldiers who might be trying to avoid returning to the front. Nikolai shrugs this off, but X grows paranoid about being found out as an impostor and killed. Even the nurses and doctors seem nervous since the male orderlies can be sent to the front again, and the doctors could be sent to triages near the front if they fail in their duties.

The government representatives arrive two days later. They declare eight of the orderlies fit to return to battle and inspect the patients; every so often, they pin a medal on a patient’s gown, including a brain-dead soldier who cannot even acknowledge the honor. One of the men starts flirting with Tamara, who attempts to reject him; X notices that the man is wearing a wedding ring and is old enough to be her father. When the doctors and other men return, the flirting stops. The government men offer a medal to the paralyzed man, who reacts in fury and refuses the medal, making everyone in the hospital freeze. Tamara eventually approaches and removes the medal, and the man, crying, thanks her.

Despite everyone’s nervousness, Tamara is not punished for her actions. X comments that she is both pretty and a genuinely good person, making her extremely attractive to every soldier in the ward. He flirts with her lightly while she checks his pulse but later sees her out the window with a handsome, tall man, who gives her a scarf and holds her hands. The other soldiers tell X that she has a boyfriend, like most of the nurses.

After about two weeks, the number of soldiers and the rate of supplies slow down due to a German blockade. The doctors, with more time on their hands, attend to X, removing tubing and sutures from him; because they have waited so long, it is difficult and painful to remove. His knee is also recovering, and the doctor prescribes bedrest until he can walk with support. The doctor works on the bullet wound on his back, exposing his backside to Tamara, and X indignantly tries to cover himself, earning a laugh from the other nurse and a frantic apology from Tamara.

The doctors and nurses tend to Nikolai’s casts and quickly discover that his legs have been affected by gangrene and are rotting, infected, and blackened due to the lack of antibiotics. They tell him they will have to amputate both his legs, to Nikolai’s horror and protest. They perform the surgery nearly immediately, and Nikolai grows quiet and cries in his bed, refusing to speak to anyone.

The next day, X begins to practice walking with the nurses but feels guilty due to Nikolai’s condition. That night, he lies silent and guilty in bed, but Nikolai gently touches his hand and promises that he will make it. X cries, and they clasp hands for a while in the dark.

X decides to recover quickly for Nikolai and does so, eventually growing strong enough to begin helping in the kitchen, which reminds him of home. He idly comments on this to Mikhos, who grows excited that his memory is returning. X plays along but claims not to remember anything else and, after that, sprinkles in small, harmless “memories” to keep people believing he has amnesia and is recovering.

The hospital begins to fill up again, so X and some other recovering soldiers move to a house near the hospital, where X sleeps alone in the decrepit parlor. He enters a new routine—waking up early, going to the hospital, washing up, eating breakfast, and working for the day. He helps in the wards, performing grueling medical work, but feels better about himself for it and spends much of his time with Nikolai and Tamara. Eventually, he becomes a temporary medical orderly.

X writes letters for the illiterate soldiers, but one day, a letter arrives for him, surprising him. He learns that Zoya and an orderly, Rubin, contacted his “family” and told them he was alive. The letter is from the real Aleksandr’s mother, who insists she can help him recover his memory when he returns home. Their excitement at his “survival” fills him with guilt. Tamara notices his strange mood and questions him; he tells her that he doesn’t know who this family is and that he is nobody, which she strongly and personally rejects. X thinks about her insistence that he is important to her all night, creating a new fantasy that she cares for him.

When summer arrives, X spends more time out behind the hospital, watching the abandoned playground and wondering what it was like before the war. Tamara joins him sometimes and eventually begins to share about herself. She explains that she is 15, grew up in the village, went to the school that became the hospital, and that her father built the playground for her and the other children, who would play a game called Dungeon World in it. Tamara’s father was arrested for anti-communism when she was a baby. She hates the Communists for his arrest and subsequent death when he was arrested a second time and sent to Leningrad. Her mother ran off with another man. Her father died in a death squad—a group of men sent forward against the Germans to trigger mines and throw grenades if they make it. Tamara and X bond over their hatred of the Nazis and the Communists.

Later, X’s friend Rubin gets a huge antique radio and record player in their boarding house functioning, and they drag it to the hospital with records. While the radio doesn’t work at first, they eventually get Tchaikovsky to play, and the people in the hospital show true joy. Every day from then on, they play music and news in the hospital. One day, letters arrive, and Tamara receives one, but runs outside soon after, a horrified expression on her face. X follows her and learns that her scarf is the only thing left of her boyfriend, who died within five weeks of going to the front. X tries to comfort her, but she gets confused when he calls Isaak her boyfriend, explaining through tears that he was her brother. He embraces her as Russian propaganda pours over the radio.

Tamara grows quiet after her brother’s death and clings to X’s side; he is unsure whether she wants him to be a substitute for her brother or if she likes him romantically but tries to comfort her regardless alongside her other friends. Her grieving continues until the day when she drops a liter of blood, earning an intense scolding from Zoya; Zoya then transforms the scolding into a gentle reassurance that even though she has lost her entire family, she must keep going for her patients. Zoya tells her to stop thinking about herself and her grief and bury her pain in caring for the patients, which lifts Tamara’s spirits.

X begins walking to the hospital with Tamara and the others. One morning, he goes early and learns there will be an inspection, so they must clean everything. As he worries about being taken into an army he doesn’t even belong to, Tamara comes and kisses him on the cheek. He lifts a pot of boiling water but spills some on his arm and swears loudly in German. Tamara hears and reacts in horror but doesn’t tell anyone; still, another nurse senses tension between them when she bandages X’s arm. All the orderlies except Mikhos and X are taken back to the army, and X feels sick with shame.

The men who are “healed” but too disabled to fight again are taken home, including Nikolai, who tearfully says farewell to X. X sits on a crate and feels frozen despite the warmth of the sunshine; he is unable to talk to Tamara since she discovered his secret and knows he could be turned in at any moment. A new offensive begins, and wounded soldiers begin pouring in, forcing X and the others to work 12-hour shifts to care for them all.

One day, they get an order to evacuate to another town, and they struggle to get everyone and everything from the hospital in line. X joins the hospital staff on a truck; as they leave Alreni, however, they are caught in gunfire, which kills Katerina. A mortar round hits the bus behind them, and the truck stops; the few survivors and some scared villagers replace the hospital staff on the truck, forcing Tamara, X, Sergo, Zoya, and Mikhos to run into the woods for protection from the German assault. Mikhos dies under a burning tree and the others dive into a deep ravine to save themselves from the forest fire, but soon realize Zoya isn’t with them.