Maid: Hard Work, Low Pay, and a Mother’s Will to Survive

Mia is Stephanie’s daughter with boyfriend Jamie. Because Jamie shares custody of Mia, he often uses her to control Stephanie. On occasions, he refuses to watch Mia so Stephanie can pursue jobs. He emotionally manipulates Mia and attempts to turn her against Stephanie, trying to convince her that her mother wishes to keep them apart. When Stephanie finally makes steps toward her dream of moving to Missoula, Montana, Jamie convinces Mia to tell her mother she doesn’t want to move.

Stephanie also battles persistent guilt related to others’ judgments of her parenting (specifically, the limitations of her parenting brought about by a meager income). Amidst her custody battle with Jamie, Stephanie internalizes many of the lawyer’s comments about their insecure living environment and her inability to provide for Mia. Stephanie also feels deeply hurt whenever authority figures suggest she is not providing adequate resources for her daughter. For example, when Stephanie takes Mia to the doctor for health issues related to the black mold in their apartment, the doctor immediately blames Stephanie for Mia’s illness, saying Stephanie needs to “do better” (224).

With her frequently varied and busy work schedule coupled with the challenge of balancing her schedule and budget, Stephanie often feels she doesn’t have the time or energy to devote to Mia. She worries even her best attempts to be present and available often fall short. It is telling that the major car accident that almost transforms Stephanie and Mia’s lives is caused by Stephanie’s attempt to retrieve Mia’s lost doll on the highway. In a state of physical and emotional exhaustion (related to her job and her poverty), Stephanie’s desire to care for Mia’s needs usurps practical judgment.

Nevertheless, Maid is filled with loving tributes to Mia including the games she plays, the observations she makes, and the clever strategies she develops to facilitate her own survival and happiness through poverty.

Jamie and Stephanie date for a while when she lives in Port Townsend, Washington. In the beginning of the relationship, he seems charming and carefree. Stephanie notes their relationship is originally intended to have a “definitive end” (18). They move into a cheap trailer with the goal of splitting rent, saving money, and helping one another get out of town (her to Missoula, Montana, and him to Portland, Oregon).

Jamie turns abusive after Stephanie becomes pregnant. Stephanie decides to keep the child because it seems important to give Jamie “the chance to be a father” (20), and because she imagines her own mother contemplating similar choices when she became pregnant with Stephanie. Jamie verbally insults and degrades Stephanie, going on frequent tirades that blame her for the pregnancy. After she gives birth, he uses their daughter Mia as a vehicle to control Stephanie, manipulating her into staying in the Port Townsend area despite what she wants.

Stephanie observes Jamie’s anger was not frequently physical and there were seldom visible marks to which she could point. This invisibility of Jamie’s anger enables him to subtly gaslight her and convince herself she is the one in the wrong.

Stephanie’s thoughtful examination of her dynamic with Jamie suggests many women—and mothers, specifically—struggle to extricate themselves from abusive relationships. Even long after they’ve left, the scars of trauma remain and they must navigate the complexities of joint child-rearing with a partner who doesn’t respect them. Stephanie also suggests that for many women, abusive relationships are part of a cycle of poverty. Women feel pressured to escalate the relationship—to move in together and split rent, for example—out of financial necessity. Thus, their relationships become codependent and even toxic. 

Stephanie’s mother grew up in poverty in northwestern Washington and she struggled with her own mother’s mental health issues. Stephanie’s mother was ambitious and sought to help her family rise up to middle-class status.

Later in Stephanie’s life, however, she left Stephanie’s father, met a British man named William, and moved to Europe. After moving to Europe, Stephanie’s mother became self-absorbed and emotionally unavailable. When Stephanie’s mother arrives to help her move out of the homeless shelter, Stephanie notes she seems out of place with her trendy European clothing, suggesting that she has become out of touch with the issues her daughter faces.

William is Stephanie’s mother’s European boyfriend. He is condescending and blames Stephanie for her poverty and the two of them don’t get along particularly well.

After fleeing Jamie, Stephanie goes to live with her father in his trailer. Soon after her arrival, he has a nervous breakdown (whether the breakdown originates from the stress of living with Stephanie and Mia, or from something else is never fully clear). He takes his breakdown out on his partner Charlotte and becomes physically and emotionally abusive (much like Jamie). He also tells concerned relatives Stephanie is exaggerating his abuse of Charlotte, and that she also fabricated Jamie’s abuse.

Charlotte is Stephanie’s father’s long-term partner. When Stephanie witnesses Charlotte experiencing abuse from Stephanie’s father, she recognizes shared aspects of their experiences. Stephanie sees the specific issues women often navigate in relationships where financial and emotional issues intersect.

Julie is Stephanie’s caseworker who helps her move from the homeless shelter to supported living to Section 8 housing. Julie makes it clear that in order to obtain these services, Stephanie must subject herself to constant checks and scrutiny.

Such checks heavily imply the government distrusts poor people. Stephanie begins to feel services are designed around the suspicion that poor people are lazy, or that they are drug addicts seeking to take advantage of the system. 

Travis is a man Stephanie meets through the internet when pursuing online dating. He lives and works on his family’s farm, and he invites Stephanie and Mia to come live with him. Though they initially get along well, Travis quickly becomes emotionally distant when Stephanie’s work schedule prevents her from helping him with farm-related tasks. He bonds with Mia, however, and Mia grows attached to him.

When Travis suddenly tells Stephanie to leave, Mia struggles with the shift in their lifestyle. Stephanie is also forced to scramble to locate affordable housing and must accept a much smaller living environment with black mold that leads to health problems. Thus, Stephanie’s relationship with Travis further illustrates the complicated intersections between loneliness, relationships, and poverty. 

Jenny is the head of the first cleaning company for whom Stephanie works. Stephanie describes Jenny as seeming as though “she’d been popular in high school and expected people to still appease her” (58). Relative to the larger outfit with which Stephanie later finds employment, Jenny’s company isn’t especially well-organized and they don’t have a strong system for ensuring the quality of their cleans. Stephanie quickly realizes that thriving in Jenny’s company has less to do with ability and work ethic than socially fitting in. 

Lonnie is the HR manager of Classic Clean, the second cleaning company for whom Stephanie works. By contrast to Jenny’s company, Classic Clean is much more organized and professional. They pay $2/hour less, but Stephanie feels their ethics and open communication make up for the pay difference.

The training and supervision process at Classic Clean are also much more personal. When Lonnie first hires Stephanie, for example, she has Stephanie clean her own apartment and personally inspects the surfaces. She is very precise in her critiques and seems to value thoroughness.

Pam is the owner of Classic Clean. She takes on an almost maternal role in Stephanie’s life, reassuring her and helping her through difficult situations. Pam also seems to deeply trust Stephanie because she recognizes Stephanie is a very hard worker.

Along with a small handful of empathetic clients, Pam becomes part of a support network for Stephanie. Because Stephanie doesn’t receive much emotional or practical support from her family, this network is essential.

Henry is a wealthy older man whose house Stephanie cleans. He is kind to her and attempts to include her in his life, offering her lobster from one of his parties (and even showing her how to cook it). Henry is one of the first clients who reaches out to Stephanie and interacts with her as a human being rather than an invisible maid who merely exists to clean his home.

Wendy is one of the clients for whom Stephanie cleans. She has cancer and needs extra help keeping her household tidy. She always makes time to prepare lunch for Stephanie and chats with her like a friend (rather than a servant). These friendly interactions help Stephanie to experience her job as an emotional outlet and not just the fulfillment of someone else’s basic needs.

Donna is one of Stephanie’s first consistent independent clients. She pays Stephanie $20/hour and tells her never to accept less. Though Classic Clean charges clients $25/hour for their cleans, Stephanie only receives $9/hour. Relationships like this highlight the disparity between what businesses make and low-wage workers take home for their labor.

Though Donna is kind to Stephanie, Stephanie observes that she displays prejudice toward immigrants and people who receive government assistance. These attitudes fill Stephanie with paranoia, as she also receives government aid. She often wonders how people like Donna would respond if they knew that someone who works for them—and who they trust—is among the government aid recipients they characterize as lazy and leaching.

The “cigarette lady”—initially so-named for the difficult-to-trace smell of cigarettes—is at first an enigma to Stephanie. She finds (and notes) various objects that suggest certain details about this woman, but she never has any personal interaction with her aside from a brief note gifting Stephanie a candle. 

Kurt is the main owner of a two-bedroom apartment into which Stephanie moves. He is easy-going and accepting.

In order to afford the apartment, Stephanie offers to trade a portion of the rent for cleaning and landscaping services. From the outset, Kurt seems more comfortable with this agreement than his wife, Alice. Kurt is supportive of Stephanie and even reads her blog posts about her social and financial struggles as a maid. He refers to her posts as inspiring, but Stephanie feels uncomfortable with the word and the level of privilege that enables this kind of response. She reflects that in order to be inspired by stories from someone’s life, the reader must feel a certain amount of distance from those stories.