Full Cicada Moon

“I remember / Papa said / if you leave eggs under a waxing moon, / all your chicks will hatch. / And Mama said / if you make a wish on the moon / over your shoulder, / it will come true. / I whisper / to the moon on my shoulder: / ‘I wish / all my dreams will hatch.’” 

Mimi takes the advice of bother her parents and merges them together. In the same way, she is both her mother and her father—a mixture of both their cultures and identities.

“‘Just remember,’ he says, / ‘be kind, be respectful, and persist.’ / ‘Like raindrops on granite,’ I say, / because we know that’s how I persist— / drip, drip, drip / until the granite cracks.”

Mimi’s father teaches Mimi that slow, steady persistence is the key to lasting change. This metaphor is repeatedly referred to as Mimi thinks about how she must be respectful, kind, and persist if she hopes to make a difference. 

“It’s up to me to solve the puzzle / of how to answer the question / What am I?— / when I know the real question / begins with Who.”

When her classmates and teachers are overly concerned with “what” her race is, Mimi understands that she has to find the answer—not to the question of what her race or ethnicity is, but who she is as an individual. This thought signals the start of Mimi’s journey to understand and accept her identity. 

“But I am not Other; / I am / half my Japanese mother, / half my Black father, / and all me.”

When Mimi fills out forms about race and ethnicity, she doesn’t find it fair to categorize herself underneath the label of “Other”—it is too general when she is made of two very specific ethnic backgrounds. She is half her mother, half her father, and all of herself, which is someone new entirely that cannot be categorized by ethnicities on a form. 

“I’m the girl all alone at the center / of attention, / not because of what I can do / but because of what I am.”

Mimi wishes she could be that one talented girl who twirls at the center of the ice rink. However, she knows that she will always be the center of attention because of her ethnicity and never for her abilities.

“I feel like I have to be / twice as smart and funny at school, / and twice as nice and forgiving in my neighborhood / than everyone else / to be acceptable. / But everyone else can be / only half of that / to fit in.” 

Mimi acknowledges the extra effort that goes into being Japanese and African American. Rather than just being herself, she has to be twice as smart, funny, nice, and forgiving for anyone to accept her. Even then people aren’t nice to her. At the same time, everyone else can fit in without the effort because they are White. 

“Who I am and / who I become / depend on / what I look at, what I listen to, / what I touch and smell and taste.”

Mimi decides that she can choose who she becomes based on her experiences. She can choose to experience and react to things that serve the person she wants to be, and not what others perceive her to be. 

“When the ground is a blanket of snow / and the ponds turn to ice / and everyone mummies up in scarves, / it feels like everything has stopped moving, / stopped breathing, / stopped living. / But secret things are still happening / in the deep below. / And when the time is right / they make their way to the surface / and explode in a surprise of purple.” 

The crocuses grow underneath the snow all winter and sprout when the time is right, even when it seems there is nothing there. They symbolize Mimi’s own growth as a person, as well as the eventual changes that will take place in the way people around Mimi treat and perceive her. 

“It’s not in our history book. / Maybe the people who wrote the book / forgot what happened to Auntie, / or decided to leave that part out / so no one would ever know what happened. / And after a while, everyone would forget / or call those who remembered / liars.” 

After Mimi’s history teacher and classmates deny Auntie Sachi’s story about the concentration camps Japanese Americans were forced to live in during the war, she contemplates who decides what is recorded. She understands that there are people who can choose what is left out, changing a society’s collective understanding of history to the point that people forget, and those who remember are called liars.

“‘We can’t dwell on what happened / but we need to remember / so we don’t do it again. It’s our history, / but we don’t want it to be our future.’ / That’s why I’ve decided / that even after I hand in my journal to Mr. Pease / in June, I’ll keep writing in it. / I don’t want to forget, / and I don’t want someone else / to tell a different story about me.” 

When Mimi tells her parents how her teacher and class reacted to the existence of concentration camps, her mother thinks they shouldn’t dwell on it. However, her father believes they should learn from their mistakes. Mimi agrees and decides to continue writing poems in her journal even after handing it in. She doesn’t want people to forget the truth of her experiences or fabricate stories about her life the way history books have about the Japanese Americans. 

“After Timothy leaves, I realize he didn’t ask me / all the usual questions. / Maybe he doesn’t care about them. / And that makes me smile.” 

When Mimi becomes friends with Timothy, he doesn’t once ask the questions others do about her race. Mimi finally starts to feel accepted by someone and is happy to know that he doesn’t seem to care what her race is.

“This is our history, and I won’t forget it. / Then he writes my name in the flour: / Mimi for the cicada’s song; / Yoshiko for my obaasan; / Oliver for Papa. / ‘You have your mama’s eyes,’ he says, / ‘and you have my stories.’”

When Papa bakes bread with his father’s starter, he tells Mimi stories of his parents’ childhood. Their traditions tell their history, just like their characteristics often do. The way Mimi sees the world resembles her mother, just as she has inherited her father’s traditions. 

“I see it’s pockmarks— / its craters and seas— / though it tries hard to hide them / in our shadow. / ‘I will touch you,’ I whisper, / but Timothy says, ‘I said no touching.’ / His words pull me back / to Earth.”

When Mimi finally sees the moon through Mr. Dell’s telescope, she whispers to it that she will touch it. Though Timothy thinks she means the telescope, Mimi actually hopes to touch the moon one day—both literally and figuratively reaching her dreams. 

“Why do all my friends here— / Stacey and Timothy— / come to my house / but never invite me to theirs?”

This four-lined poem expresses Mimi’s despair at how she is treated differently because of her race even by her closest friends. They aren’t allowed to come to her house because of her ethnicity, and she questions why. The poem’s length emphasizes the emotions behind her statement.

“I’m afraid to love what I see—afraid it would be too vain / to think the girl with the blue dress and shiny lips / and hair curling around her shoulders / is pretty, so I say, / ‘You are so talented.’”

When Mimi gets ready for the dance with Stacey, she’s embarrassed to consider herself as beautiful because of the way others perceive her. She internalizes people’s perception of her as different and doesn’t dare to feel confident in her physical characteristics, and she attributes how she looks to Stacey’s makeup skills instead.

“I enjoyed reading this very much / and I do know you better. / Please keep writing poetry— / you have a gift. / I’m glad it helped Mr. Pease know me. / But even better, / it has helped me know myself.”

Mimi’s English teacher enjoyed reading Mimi’s journal, as it has given him a new perspective on who she is. Though Mimi is happy he understands who she is, considering everyone’s interest in her racial background on her first day, she is even happier that the process has helped her learn about, find, and accept her own identity. 

“I am thirteen today, / and the moon that disappeared / from my science project / and from tonight’s sky / is here, dangling at my throat.”

On Mimi’s birthday, Timothy gives Mimi a necklace with a crescent pendant. Though someone stole the moon she worked so hard on for her Science Groove project and it is a New Moon outside, Mimi feels like the moon is dangling from her neck. The moon symbolizes her aspirations and dreams that seem to have disappeared and have now been symbolically handed to her by someone she cares about.

“‘I read there are cicadas / that live in the ground for years. / They’re called magicicadas, / and when they’re ready, they all burst out at once / and fly, blocking out the moon.’ / ‘Mother saw that once,’ she says. ‘I wish we could see them here.’ / I look into the part of the sky / where the New Birthday Moon should be, / and say, ‘They wait until just the right time.’”

Mimi tells Stacey that she was named after the sound of the cicada. The symbol of the cicada’s song represents Mimi’s growth and striving for her aspirations. Just as the cicadas burst out and cover the moon when the time is right, she will be her best self, reach her goals, and shine brighter than the moon only when the time is right. 

“Papa opens his desk drawer and takes out a button—March for Freedom and Jobs— / and tapes it onto the new frame. He says, / ‘Even now, that day reminds me / that raindrops are stronger than hammers.’” 

Mimi’s father reminisces on the peaceful protests he attended. He keeps memoirs of them as a reminder that raindrops—slow and steady persistence—are more effective and stronger than the strength of hammers (forcing instant change). 

“But courage is / Taking that one small step / anyway.” 

In this poem, Mimi reflects on all the instances of loneliness and fear that those closest to her encounter. At the end of the poem, she understands that courage is taking one small step towards the direction one wants to go, despite feelings of fear and loneliness. 

“When I stand up to leave, I say, / ‘Thank you, Mr. MacDougall. / You’re a real credit to your race.’”

When the principal applauds Mimi for excelling in her studies, he tells her that she is a real credit to her race. Offended, she flips the narrative and tells him the same thing when he finally agrees to take a small step in creating a home economics club for boys and shop club for girls. 

“All at once, I’m not mad or sad / or embarrassed anymore. / Instead, I hug Stacey and then her mom / and pardon them / for their confusion / about everything, because, / just like me, they are learning / how to take / one small step.”

When Mimi witnesses Stacey and her mom’s reaction to how the salesgirl suspected Mimi for shoplifting, she chooses not to be angry with them. She understands that they are confused because they never had anyone close to them experience such prejudice. Just like Mimi is taking one small step in other parts of life, they too are taking their first steps to understand the experiences of people of color. 

“I used to think the people of Vermont / were like the snow— / crusty, / chilly, / and slow to thaw. / But now I think / they’re what’s underneath. / Like the crocus bulbs making flowers all winter / in the dark earth— / invisible until they push through the snow— / and like the cicadas growing / underground for years— / until they burst from the ground— / the people of Vermont / do their hardest thinking / and their richest feeling / deep inside, / so no one can see.”

The symbol of the crocus flower describes what Mimi has learned about the people of Vermont. They aren’t cold like ice or slow to warm up. Rather, they think and feel richly and deeply underneath the surface where no one can see, before finally showing who they truly are. Seeing the change in Mr. Dell and hearing his story makes Mimi believe that people have good in them even if it’s not immediately visible.