50 pages • 1 hour read
Amir Levine, Rachel S.F. HellerAttached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
Nonfiction | Book | Adult | Published in 2010A modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more.
Themes
The Importance of Understanding Attachment Styles
Inspired by their research, Levine and Heller detail the power of attachment theory to free individuals with anxious and avoidant attachment styles from the barriers hindering them from experiencing deep human connection and satisfaction. An exploration of the anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment styles, Attached combines curated research and real-life examples to educate readers on attachment theory. Throughout the text, Levine and Heller argue that an understanding of one’s attachment style clarifies the motivations behind one’s actions, optimizes the process of choosing a compatible partner, and improves the quality of existing relationships.
Through their work on attachment theory, Levine and Heller discovered understanding attachments provided romantic partners with “an easy and reliable way to understand and predict people’s behavior in any romantic situation” (9). Armed with this new knowledge, anxious, avoidant, and secure partners could learn to predict the behavior of potential partners, existing partners, or even themselves rather than navigating the turbulent channels of romantic relationships without a guide. According to Levine and Heller, the enlightenment elicited through this process of understanding empowers individuals. In their Introduction, the authors wonder “if we could help people have some measure of control” over their lives (11). They conclude that such control would allow individuals to “work toward becoming more secure in their attachment styles instead of letting life sway them every which way” (11). The outcome of control is a newfound clarity that would demystify unexplainable actions of oneself and one’s romantic partners. With such clarity, individuals can identify the attachment styles of partners and determine compatibility with their own.
Levine and Heller weave together their facts with personal narratives. They present various examples of how the quality of one’s life improves through a newfound understanding of attachment styles. Early in the text, they advise readers to “choose wisely when you are getting involved with someone, because the stakes are high: Your happiness depends on it!” (77). Throughout Attached, the authors cite the support of various studies, which “demonstrate that individuals with a secure attachment style report higher levels of satisfaction in relationships” (132). By emphasizing the outcomes of happiness and satisfaction, Levine and Heller reinforce the importance of understanding one’s own attachment style. The personal anecdotes knit into every chapter reiterate to readers the real-life effects of this process. The stories of Marsha, Tamara, and Emily warn about the dangers of ignoring the impact of attachment styles and share the positive outcomes of these stories.
The Possibility of Change
Levine and Heller strive to guide readers through the process of change. Attached invites readers to learn from and interact with their text using a hopeful tone. By maintaining this tone throughout their guide, Levine and Heller aim to inspire their readers to believe in the power of attachment theory to transform relationships and lives.
From the beginning of the text, Levine and Heller proclaim their intention to provide a step-by-step guide into changing the way that readers interact with romantic partners. A psychiatrist and neuroscientist, Levine called upon his friend Heller “to help him transform the academic studies and scientific data he’d been reading into practical guidelines and advice that people could use to actually change the course of their lives” (7-8). Levine and Heller state this goal in their Introduction to alert readers of their intentions. They stay focused on integrating real world application into the resources they include within Attached. To convey the possibility of change, Levine and Heller cite studies from established researchers that prove that individuals are able to adapt their attachment styles. One such statistic describes how, “on average, one in four people” work to adjust their attachment style “over a four-year period” (11). Levine and Heller cite this statistic to legitimize their claims and encourage readers that such change is possible.
Relying on personal narratives, Levine and Heller chronicle the various ways their research subjects find ways to adopt secure tactics and build intimacy with supportive partners. Each story ends triumphantly. By including these personal stories of success, the authors aim to inspire readers to observe the possibility of finding a supportive partnership in their own lives. Even Marsha, whom Levine and Heller feature in their chapter about separation, extracts herself from her toxic relationship with Craig and “[goes] on to meet someone with whom she has a happy life” (202). Because of her implementation of secure attachment tactics, Marsha improves her life and “never again” experiences “the emotional turmoil that she felt with Craig” (202). She serves as an example of the change Levine and Heller promote throughout their text.
To communicate their belief in the possibility of change, the authors incorporate the use of the second-person point of view. They speak directly to the reader, aiming to establish a connection between writer and audience. Confident in their belief in the power to change, Levine and Heller declare that “you’ll learn what your needs are and who you should be with in order to be happy in a relationship” and that “you’ll gain insight into why you both think and act as you do and learn strategies to improve your satisfaction level” (18). The phrasing of “you will” demonstrates confidence in their readers’ capacity for change.
The Biological Aspects of Attachment
To fulfill their goal of educating readers on attachment theory, Levine and Heller inform their audience about the biological aspects of attachment, which explore the origins of attachment and highlight the strengths and weaknesses of each attachment style. Levine and Heller emphasize the universal need for attachment and unite readers with secure, anxious, and avoidant attachment styles.
To begin their discussion of the biological aspects of attachment, the authors introduce Bowlby, who is considered to be a pioneer in the field of attachment theory. Levine and Heller share Bowlby’s findings on how humans universally search for attachment to others, how “we’ve been bred to be dependent on a significant other,” and how this need “starts in the womb and ends when we die” (12). By underscoring the biological need for connection, Levine and Heller present a message about the importance of attachment theory that applies to all, regardless of one’s attachment style.
The universal longing for attachment unites individuals with secure, anxious, and avoidant attachment styles by revealing how the desire to build intimacy affects all humans. Levine and Heller explain how the “biological mechanism specifically responsible for creating and regulating our connection with attachment figures” is built into human brains (12). Called the attachment system, this mechanism “ensures that we remain safe and protected by staying close to our loved ones” (12). For securely attached individuals, this information supports the secure tactics they naturally gravitate to. For avoidants, this information challenges the impulse for independence that hinders their ability to connect. For anxiously attached individuals, this information justifies the all-consuming search for intimacy. No matter the effect, the biological aspects of attachment impact all attachment styles.
Throughout Attached, Levine and Heller document the evolutionary benefits of each attachment style to comfort individuals with anxious and avoidant attachment styles and to inspire these individuals to shift toward secure methods of attachment. They describe how each attachment style served a purpose in the past; in a world filled with crises, each style offered humans tools to adapt and survive. Heterogeneity, or variability, is an aspect of evolutionary biology. It increased the chances of survival because, “if we were all identical, then any single environmental challenge would have the potential to wipe us all out” (13). Levine and Heller’s inclusion of this information offers anxious and avoidant individuals a deeper understanding of the origins of their attachment styles. Once able to identify the purpose their styles served, these individuals can understand the need for change Levine and Heller promote throughout Attached.
