Anything But Typical

PhoenixBird sends Jason a story to read before she posts it. The story doesn’t fit into any specific genre, but it is a tale of a fictional world where everyone is self-sufficient and lives alone. Jason waits before responding, hoping that PhoenixBird will think he is away or that his power is out. Jason thinks of the word “adjudicate” this morning, and the word comes back to him all day.

Suzy arrives to babysit for his parents’ date night. Jason misses the way his mother used to put him to bed every night, lying next to him until he fell asleep. Her body next to his provided all the comfort he needed. He wishes that she hadn’t judged him too old to need a parent to put him to bed. Suzy assures Jason’s mother that they will be fine—she has been babysitting for the family for a long time. Jason likes how much Suzy uses her hands when she talks; he can read what she’s saying in her hand motions instead of trying to read her facial expressions.

Even though he knows that Suzy likes him, and they have a good relationship, Jason fills with anxiety at his parents’ departure. His brain feels funny, like “it fills up and lifts off my head” (40). He has to put all his energy into breathing and trying to prevent his hands from flying around, so he looks away from his parents. His father kisses him and says goodbye, but Jason does not respond. His parents have no idea how much he doesn’t like it when they leave or what he is experiencing internally at this moment, and his mother misinterprets his avoidance for apathy and rejection. He overhears his mother expressing her disappointment that Jason doesn’t show his feelings or seem to love her. Jason feels bad for making his mother sad. If he lived in the fictional world of PhoenixBird’s story, he would be self-sufficient and wouldn’t need his mother anymore, which would make her happy. Jason decides to respond to PhoenixBird, even though writing to her makes him feel vulnerable. He tells her the story is good and that he looks forward to reading the rest. 

Suzy reminds Jason that it is almost time for bed while he is enjoying his nightly pre-bedtime computer hour. He looks up at his ceiling and sees the alphabet that his father painted there for him when he was four. When he was in pre-school, his mother thought he was a genius and showed off his impressive ability to spell any word. His grandmother was less impressed, asking what the point was of Jason writing down “meaningless words” (46) if he couldn’t or wouldn’t speak. His dad told her that the words and letters had meaning for Jason. That same day he painted the alphabet on Jason’s ceiling. Jason thinks of letters as members of a family, each with their own unique DNA and physical representation. He gets lost in a train of thought about the way letters look and the way people use letters to form words that have a meaning different from what the person actually means.

Suzy interrupts his thoughts when she notices the ceiling for the first time, and Jason wishes the letters could speak and spell out his thoughts of affection for her. Instead, because he is tired, he rocks silently. He is about to go to bed when he sees a new message from PhoenixBird. He is amazed that they are both sitting at their computers at the same time, and even more amazed that she says she is worried about her grades in school. She tells him that his notes are really helping her with the story, which is for her language arts class. Jason recalls that school was easier for him until everyone caught up to his spelling abilities in the second grade: “I wasn’t such a genius anymore […] A year later the only letters anybody cared about were ASD, NLD, and maybe ADD or ADHD” (50). 

Jason is in art class, which he hates. He does not like his teacher, Mrs. Hawthorne, a mean boy named Eric Doyle, or the loud noises in the room. Last week, when he was angry with the teacher about something he can no longer remember, instead of pushing her directly, which he wanted to do, he pushed and broke the teacher’s potter’s wheel. It broke into pieces and shocked his classmates. The clay landed in the shape of a dog, which caused Jason to involuntarily bark like a dog. This sent the class into fits of laughter, which angered Mrs. Hawthorne. She ran out and some of the kids took the opportunity to throw clay around the class. Some of his classmates’ parents tried to get Jason removed from the class because they assumed he had thrown the clay, and none of the children said otherwise. One girl’s mother “said I was dangerous and shouldn’t be in school with the normal kids” (55). Jason worries that this incident will require him to have a one-on-one aide again, which his mother would not like.

In the week since the incident, Eric Doyle has been teasing Jason for the dog bark sound. Mrs. Hawthorne is trying to be nicer, but her assignment doesn’t make sense to Jason. She expects him to draw a face following her instructions, but he doesn’t see how he can make a two-dimensional representation of a three-dimensional object. He misses his aide Jane, who would have helped him draw and avoid getting in trouble. His IEP allows him to go home when he feels he cannot handle school anymore, and this is what he chooses today. As he waits for his dad to pick him up, he calms himself by thinking that when he gets home he might have a message from PhoenixBird, which would mean he has one real friend.

When Jason arrives home, he reads the end of PhoenixBird’s story, which is about a character born to help others in whatever way she can. This cheers him up. Over lunch, his mother expresses her disappointment that Jason came home early from school—now, Jason is uncomfortable because his routine is off. He is upset about disappointing his mother. Jason gets visibly upset as he remembers that at school, to avoid hurting anyone and thus disappointing his mother, he had crawled under the table. Seeing Jason upset, his dad holds him. Jason feels secure when his dad holds him because he can breathe easily and feels the support of his dad’s body.

Referencing The Catcher in the Rye, Jason points out that we only know his version of what happened in art class. We may believe him, but “a narrator can be unreliable. They can be telling the truth or just the truth as they see it […] I didn’t do anything to Mrs. Hawthorne to make her send me home” (63). This implies that Jason may have done something in art class that he doesn’t want to talk about or admit.

Before bed, Jason checks his messages and finds one from PhoenixBird. She tells him about her dog Blanche and that her school had diversity day today. He can tell by the way she is sharing with him that they are now officially friends. He decides not to share anything about his day because “something tells me that would not be a good idea” (64).